Gratitude Project: Complete!

Today is August 19, which means I am 30 years old, and it has been 30 days since I started my daily gratitude project!  I actually can't believe I was able to keep up with it because there really aren't too many things I am successful at doing consistently now that I have a baby in the home. But, this was important and I wanted to do something intentional as I closed one decade of my life and entered a new one.

One thing that I really liked about this little project was that it helped me focus more on the positive things in my life during the day. Since I spend a lot of time in the car each day, I really enjoyed thinking about who I would write about in my gratitude blog that day. Some days it was easy, because of something that happened, but other days it was hard to choose just one person. The other thing this made me think about was that there is something I am grateful for about pretty much everyone I know. In this project I got to write about people that I love, old friends and new, co-workers, those who have passed away and people that I don't even know. There are people that play major and minor roles in our lives, but all are significant.

So, bottom line is that I am so grateful for this life I have and that is because of all the awesome people in it! THANKS to everyone who has helped make these last 30 years wonderful!
~Carly

and here is the link to the video that inspired me to express my gratitude in this way...

Soul Pancake- Science of Happiness

Angela

Today is the last day of my twenties, and I am spending it mostly in bed and on the couch. Everyone in my home is sick and it forced us to cancel our birthday plans for this weekend. I am thinking that I won't be better tomorrow, either. Oh how I hate to call in sick...and on a Monday...and on your birthday. Ugh!  As I have laid here all weekend hoping and trying to make myself think that I will be well on Monday, I realize that viruses do not operate on a work-week schedule. I will have to be out sick, but I am really grateful that I have such a supportive and understanding boss.

Angela has been my supervisor for almost 5 years and I feel so grateful to have her. She is understanding, fair, easy to approach, and just a really good person. She has helped me grow into a confident professional and has set a really good example of how a leader should treat her subordinates. To work in an environment where you feel respected and valued is something that I know is rare. I appreciate the fact that she works hard to make work-life the best it can be for us. Last week I was selected to take out one of the surveyors who came to audit our agency. Afterward, Angela gave me a thank-you card for doing a good job and said how much she appreciated me. I thought that was pretty cool--not every worker gets a thank-you card for just doing their job from their boss.

As a new mom working full-time, it was hard to know what to expect when I came back to work. There have been days (and weeks) that have been challenging, but I always feel like I can ask for help when I need it and that I can be my true self at the office. She has really made my transition back to work a positive one and without the support, I don't know how I would have done it. 

Brandi

Brandi is another sweet friend I met through work. Although we were at UT at the same time for undergrad, we didn't meet until a couple years ago. I remember the day that I took her to train in the hospitals and I knew that immediately that she was going to such a great hospice social worker. She has a calm and compassionate demeanor and I am always inspired by her work ethic and the way that she goes above and beyond for the people that she serves.

Brandi is someone I can always rely on for support, and just to listen. She has become a good friend and I feel really blessed to know her.

Megan

Megan is another awesome friend that I met through work. I first met her when we were co-counselors at Camp Braveheart and instantly liked her. Megan is kind, generous, down-to-Earth, and has a very warm spirit. It wasn't until the last couple years that I was able to work more closely with her in the office, that we became closer outside of work.

I mentioned her generosity. She is the type that is always willing to help someone in need. There have been a couple occasions when my spirits have been down, and Megan took me out for dinner or brunch because she knew that would help, and it did. Her kindness extends to others all around her. She is perfect for her job, part of which entails running a program that helps hospice patients who have pets that they need help with- either with food, respite care, re-homing, etc...

One of the coolest things about Megan I think is her tattoo of her pet guinea pig, Eleanor. It may sound a bit strange, but if you know her, and the circumstances surrounding how she came to adopt Eleanor, it makes perfect sense. Basically she adopted and fell in love with a young patient's pet and has given it a life that is probably one of the best any guinea pig will ever have! And he (it's a boy) will be immortalized in ink on her forearm.

Megan makes me laugh and is so fun to be around. She is another that I am grateful to call friend!

Lauren

Everyone I have ever met from North Carolina, I really like. Lauren(who is a NC native)is someone that I met when I started my first job out of collge in 2004. She started the job just a few weeks before me and we became instant friends. When I look back on that period of my life, I am SO grateful she was there to help me through it. We had a lot of fun during the 7 months that we worked there together (it felt so much longer than that)and when I lived in Dallas.

 Lauren is one of those people who is genunie and kind, but real and fun. Her friendship is one that I miss the most from those days. Lauren is the type of person that you wish you lived next door to so you could just visit with often. I still e-mail her every so often for parenting advice and tipds. She is resourceful and full of good ideas. Even though Lauren and her husband have since moved a couple of times and have a growing family, I hope that our paths will cross again one day. You never know! I actually did have the pleasure of seeing them when they were in Michigan for a summer and I was there, too. That was really fun.

Daycare workers

Yesterday my sister watched Ruby for the day. When I picked her up, she remarked at just how much work it was to watch one baby, let alone 10+ like the daycare caregivers do. I personally cannot imagine doing that work every day, but I am grateful there are people who do work in that capacity. Lately I find that as soon as I drop off my daughter in the mornings, I have some sense of relief and can shift my focus toward my 9-5 work, without worrying too much about my daughter. Sometimes I try to imagine what it would be like to come to the daycare as my job. I would not last long. I know that daycares often get a bad wrap, and I too complain about how expensive they are, but the people there do work really hard and are really un-sung heroes. These pepole make it possible for me to exist in this world doing the two things that I care about the most: work in a field that gives me purpose and care for my family, which also gives me purpose. I wish I had the resources to pay these people what they actually deserve, and give them benefits that they should have such as sick time, but I can't. They show up every day with the charge of caring for my most precious possession (if you will) and keep her safe, fed, clean, and for the most part, happy. Oh, and they really do love her. I am thankful for all the caregivers who love my child and other children who are not theirs, and who work hard so that parents can also work hard outside the home.

Ryan D.

Ryan and I met during orientation of graduate school. She came up to me and said that I looked familiar to her, but it seemed as though we had never met before. Ryan and I ended up being in the same class for our practicum and then we also ended up being at the same site for our internship...in Temple. Turns out we were also at the same unit and interned together there during that first semester. We carpooled to Temple twice a week and spent many hours, early hours, discussing everything under the sun.

When I look back upon that time in my life, I see Ryan there navigating it together. There were a lot of challenges and angst we both faced that year, but I would say both of us grew and created better paths for ourselves. It is always nice to have a person to share an experience with and I won't ever forget our time together. Whenever I drive up to Dallas, and pass through Temple, I think if Ryan and me. I remember her telling me that the reason I could never remember the exit to get off at was a sign that I really did not want to be there. Ha!

Ryan got married just a couple months before Nick and I did, and she had her first daughter 6 weeks before Ruby was born. I am grateful for her support during the early days of navigating motherhood. She is someone I know can relate to the joys and challenges that this phase of life brings.

Patty

Although I don't actually know her (I can say I did meet her once!), I am grateful for Patty Griffin. I think everyone probably has that one musician who just speaks to them and helps kind of define a significant period in their lives. For me, it's Patty.

She is one that I never tire of. I love driving around during my workday listening to the music of Patty Griffin. There was one time a few years ago that I was walking the trail at the lake and was listening to one of her songs, "Up to the Mountain," on my iPod when I actually passed by her. She was walking the opposite direction with a friend. I thought that was cool.

Professor C

I had the very good fortune of meeting Professor Joe Culver as I was starting my second year at UT. A business student and RA at the time, he was assigned to my dorm floor as our "Faculty Fellow," which meant that he would come and eat at the dorm and get to know some of the residents. Because I was the RA, I got to know Prof C (as he liked to be called) very well, and it couldn't have come at a better time for me.

In 2002, Prof C had already worked at UT for decades and I think he was technically in retirement, but he kept an office at the B. School and maintained connections with the career office, doing what he loved the absolute most--helping students. Prof C was a master networker and a champion of students. Over the next two years I was at UT, we would meet and have lunch and stay in touch via email. He helped get me into the Communications School at UT when I knew that business would not be my cup of tea. He helped connect me to professionals in Dallas after I graduated and wrote me one of the kindest letters of recommendation I have ever read. Prof C was a kind, gentle man who was adored by MANY. He loved telling success stories about his students and especially about his grandchildren. He also loved sharing inspiration quotations and just had a real passion for his life, family and career. It was no surprise to me when he told me one time that a former student recently had a baby boy and named the child after Prof C. He was touched. He also spoke of growing up in Austin when I35 was just a little road and he would play football with his brothers in the median!

The last time I met with Prof C was during my time in graduate school. Not too long ago, I tried to contact him to catch up and let him know that I had become a social worker (his wife is a Social worker) and was enjoying a career in hospice and that I just had a baby. Unfortunately, I came across his obituary and discovered that he had passed away just a few months before. I read the guest entries online and they made me smile, because there were so many former students, just like me, that had really been touched by the good Professor. I wrote his wife to express my condolences and to let her know what an impact he had on me during my time on the 40 Acres. She wrote back a sweet message, and expressed just how terribly she misses him. I can only imagine.

Thank you, Prof C, for being such a wonderful friend and kind spirit to me. I hope to be able to help others the way you helped me.

Jess

I met Jess when she was doing her internship at my agency a few years ago. We became instant friends and bonded over our affinity for Taco Deli, where we would lunch regularly. Jess is just a really cool, really fun person and I like her a lot.

We don't see each other too often these days, but we make a point to stay in touch and try to lunch every now and then during our busy workweeks. I have enjoyed getting together over the last few years and having someone to discuss a variety of topics with. Jess is so easy to talk to and is someone who really cares about what you have to say. I am grateful that we met and that we have stayed in touch.

Ashley

I met Ashley the first day of class at UT in 2001. We sat by each other in our MIS class and have been friends ever since. We both quickly decided that we did not belong in the business program and each of us found our way out as soon as we could, but we will always have MIS to thank for our friendship. Those early days at UT will always stick with me, as 9/11 happened just a couple weeks after we started college. With everything already being new as a college Freshman on a large campus, and with the uncertainty of the times, it was nice to have had an instant friend!

Through the years, Ashley and I have stayed in touch and met often for brunch or a happy hour. We graduated and she moved to Houston and I to Dallas. When I came back for graduate school to Austin, I soon learned that Ashley was also on her way back to the great city. It was nice to be back in Austin together and in a different chapter in our lives.

So one of the things I am most grateful for Ashley is her willingness to to out together on July 26, 2007. She agreed to go with me to an organized young professional happy hour. After a pretty lame happy hour experience at a Texas Exes Event just earlier in the week, I was glad that she was still game. So, we went out again and had a pretty good time meeting some new people, and had redemption from our last experience. It worked out pretty well for me because if she hadn't come with me that night, I never would have gone, and I never would have met Nick.

I am glad to say that Ashley's journey is also turning out pretty well. I am so happy that she too has found love and happiness and adventure. Ashley has been a good friend and has always celebrated others and is someone who I am really glad sat down beside me back in 2001.

Lisa

I spotted Lisa at a Patty Griffin benefit several years ago. I knew that she worked at Hospice Austin but  I didnt know her name. I later came to meet her in the office after I noticed what a cool shade of nail polish she had on and struck up a conversation. Lisa always has great polish. She first introduced me to Essie and my favorite color, Apple Mint!

Lisa and I ended up sharing several patients at a nursing home and we got to know each other and we hung out some. Lisa is really fun to hang out with and happy hour with. Last year, when I got pregnant, I didn't know how to tell Lisa because I knew that she was really trying to get pregnant as well, and things had been anything but easy for her. But, just a little while later, Lisa announced she too was pregnant...and with TWINS!

Lisa is one of those people who epitomizes generosity. She is the one who will bring in breakfast tacos for the whole meeting, or buy someone a really cool birthday cake. She does things for people "just because" and is really the sweetest person ever. She quit working about 1/2 way in to her pregnancy and I was sad to lose her as a co-worker, but her girls were born just a month after Ruby and so they will be friends now too.

Peg

Peg is one of those people you cannot help but love. She is kind, funny, wise, present. She is so good at being present. I first met her in 2006 when we worked a grief camp together. I was still in graduate school and she was working as s social worker at Hospice Austin. I learned so much from her those few days we spent with the littlest grievers at camp. As soon as we met to discuss plans for the camp, I knew I wanted to be like Peg. I wanted to work here, be near her, learn from her.

A little over a year later, my wish came true! I was actually following in Peg's footsteps in many ways. I took over several different territories that Peg had worked over the next couple of years. Talk about BIG shoes to fill. Watching Peg interact with patients is really something special. There were times I felt sad for the patients that they had to lose her....not that I was bad or anything, but that I would really have hated to lose her if she were my social worker. Peg is one of those people who make you feel comfortable and understood. She is also a thoughtful advocate.

Peg is always supportive of me, especially when I am having a rough patch. She is aware of other people's suffering and shows that she cares. She sent me a very sweet email yesterday of encouragement when I was selected to take a surveyor out during their audit. I am thankful to work with her and call her friend.

Sara & Marshall

My Aunt Sara and Uncle Marshall have always been in my life. Even before they had children of their own, I would go and spend the night at their home. I would get sent home with a box of oatmeal raisin cookies. When their daughters were young, I would spend a lot of time there, playing or helping with the girls and also went with them on excursions to Austin or to their country home. I have such fond memories of being with them.

At every stage in my life, I can see them there. They have always celebrated me and the things that I have done. They are both extremely generous people and would do anything for anyone in need...like donating a kidney. Sara did that. It is inspiring to even know someone that would do that.

I feel lucky to call these people my family, and am grateful for all the support they have given me throughout my life.

Amy

Amy would win the award for the person I was most grateful for in 2012. She arrived at my home around 6:00 p.m. on September 15. This was the only stranger I have ever met while I was lying undressed on the floor curled up in a ball. She came right over to me and told me how beautiful I was. Even though I was in pain, I remember thinking, "awww....really!?" I sure didn't feel beautiful AT ALL. I felt like a mess. From there Amy soothed me and massaged me and helped me through the painful contractions I was experiencing. She helped me take them one at a time and her calm, peaceful presence made us feel secure. When it was time to leave for the hospital, Amy followed in her car and met us there. She was with me through it all. She helped me give birth to my daughter naturally and she told me when it was all over that I was a "Rockstar."

Words can't describe the gratitude that I had for my doula. She made my labor experience one that was overall very positive for both Nick and me, and I could not have asked for anything better. It was so wonderful to have someone that was there just for me. I remember thinking that she was like an angel. I am sad because I did not get a picture with Amy at the hospital, but I will always remember her. I hope that when we have another baby, she can be there, too. Using a doula was one of the best things I have ever decided to do, and it was worth every penny.

Ryan G.

My sister has been dating Ryan for a couple of years now. Today we went to Ryan's parent's home and visited for a while on our way home from San Antonio. While driving home, I was thinking about how happy my sister has been since she has been dating Ryan. He is also really good and loving with Ruby. These are two wonderful things, and is reason enough I am grateful for Ryan.

Alicia

I met Alicia in graduate school and we quickly bonded over a shared interest in social justice and capital punishment. Since then, Alicia has been such a fixture in my life and in Austin. She was the one who helped me get a position at Hospice Austin and then put up with me for a year and a half complaining until I got on full-time. Alicia is a good friend to many, and I am grateful for the friendship we  have developed over the years.

I remember when I started at Hospice Austin and Alicia was taking me out on visits while I trained. I knew that she was a good social worker, but when I saw her in action, I was really blown away. I just remember thinking about how present she was and how her compassion came through in the way she interacted with every person. A couple years ago, it was announced that she had been awarded "Social Worker of the Year" for Hospice in New Mexico and Texas. I was sooo happy, I cried. She was so deserving and I felt so happy that she was being recognized, especially early in her career, for really being one of the best.

For the last couple of years, Alicia has been in a long-distance relationship with her Brazilian beau. Their story is one that you usually only see in the movies: a summer romance in Spain during college, followed by nearly 10 years of separation and then a reunion, an international LD relationship followed by a series of set-backs due to immigration issues...and finally an engagement and a move to Canada! In less than one month these two will be married in Austin. I am so thankful that their story has a happy ending(/new beginning to come). They both deserve so much happiness and good fortune in their lives. This winter the two moved to Vancouver and so the loss of Alicia in Austin is felt deeply by her friends. I am thankful, though, that Alicia has become a pen-pal of sorts. We exchange emails often and stay in touch, which I am very thankful for.

Uncle Fred

This summer visiting Michigan was different because my grandma wasn't there. One of the highlights of Michigan has always been visiting my great uncle Fred's house, which is a beautiful and picturesque place. Uncle Fred is my grandma's brother and he is now 90 years old.

Uncle Fred is another one of those people that you can't help but love. He is kind, gentle, and generous. Everybody loves Fred. I know that he has made a difference to so many people. My grandma never spoke an ill word of her brother, well except when he would get cranky with her for trying to rearrange his furniture. He was that person in her life who helped her through some really, really hard times.

We spent the day at his house this summer and watched the fireworks from his deck. Unfortunately I was battling bronchitis and didn't feel like my normal self. It was a big crowd and I spent half the day sleeping in his basement. I was sad when we left because I didn't really get to spent too much time with Uncle Fred. But luckily, Nick and Ruby and I were able to go back a couple days later when driving Ryan to the port. It turned out to be a really special day and one that I wont forget.

Ruby took to Fred like bees take to honey. She was so happy crawling all over him. I couldn't help but think about how much Mimi would have LOVED witnessing this. We just planned to stay about ah hour but then we went to lunch and then he drove us all around the area he lives, showing us different people's homes and even the place his parents (my great-grandparents) honeymooned when they first got married. When we got back, we looked through old photos together, and we talked about Mimi. He told me how much she loved me. I already knew that, of course, but it was nice to hear that other people knew that too. It is still hard to talk about her without tearing up, and I think the same is true for him.

I am always grateful for my Uncle. I was especially grateful that we had this time together this summer. Being with him made me feel the presence of my grandma.

Solina

I am starting to think my posts might sound repetitive. People in my life are really just awesome, generous people. Solina is NO exception. I first came to know Solina when I would babysit for her two daughters, Jeannette and Carly. Mainly I would be there to help make sure the girls didnt fight too much. Jeannette was just two years younger than me.

In 2003, after the death of Jeannette, I came to know Solina and her family in a much deeper way. I remember those painful, painful months that followed. I don't know how she survived it. I feel fortunate that I was able to be with her in some small way during that time and really do nothing more than sit with the pain or listen. Now that I work with people in grief, I think about her a lot and how she has traveled along her own journey since that time. She, Mike and Carly have been so generous to me, and countless others and have honored Jeannette's memory by supporting people on an individual level and also through giving in other ways. 

Through the years, Solina has listened to my woes about horrible bosses, helped to give me the courage to go to graduate school, and supported me through the ups and downs of pregnancy and new motherhood. She reminds me in some ways of my Grandma Mimi, in that when you are around Solina, she makes you feel important and special. It is nice to have someone like that in your life.

If I had to draw a picture to symbolize Solina, I think it would be a golden heart. I feel so fortunate to know her and and to call her "friend." 

Doran

I met Doran at Hospice Austin in 2008. I was working as a PRN (meaning as-needed, so my hours were not consistent or guaranteed) and she was in charge of the bereavement program. As I was eager to begin my professional social work career and gain experience in the field of grief and loss, I sought out opportunities wherever I could. Doran was always so supportive and included me in many grief programs and groups at the agency. Those experiences have been some of the best that I have had in my work. She also helped me realize my dream of obtaining my clinical license, by allowing me to see clients in the department after-hours. I felt really lucky because this work was so rewarding and it affirmed to me that I was exactly where I wanted to be. This is what I wanted to do for so long and now I was getting to do it!

What I love about Doran is that she is always willing to help people and share what she knows with others. She really helped me be able to get my LCSW and then also get trained in EMDR like she did. In some ways, I feel like I am kind of following in her shadow. She is one of those people who does things, and does them well. She has inspired me to dream bigger and not let myself get in the way of what I want.

Doran was also there for me during a time that I really needed it. She helped me pack almost my entire downstairs, and brought food, when I was alone and we were moving. People that help you move are really good friends. Anyway, when it all fell apart and crushed my world for a spell, she really helped me through it. Knowing that there was someone there to help me, was such an uplifting thing for me. Since then, we have become closer and have shared with one another different struggles. She has been unwavering in her supportive presence, even when I know it may have been hard for her.

I am grateful to have Doran as a friend and someone that I look up to for all that she has accomplished as a social worker. I asked the Universe to be kind and generous to her last year, and I am happy to know that the Universe has responded.

Job

I know this is technically not a person, but today I felt especially grateful for my job, which is made up of many people. After working in the hospice field for almost 5 years, I have had the pleasure to meet, care for, and support many people though some of the most difficult times in life. Always, always, I get more than I give.

Today a family member asked me, "So, this is what you do every day??"

"Sure do!" I said proudly.

Often I think family members forget, it's them who have the hardest job, not me.

But what I was thinking was more like, "Yes, this is what I get to do."

I won't lie, working in hospice is not like it is on those commercials. It is much more complex, intense, and challenging than I think one could ever imagine until you experience it. There are experiences that are not so fulfilling, there are situations that are met by challenge, bureaucracy, barriers to access, funding, insurance, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah...

But what I am grateful for mostly from my job is that it gives me a healthy dose of perspective on a daily basis. It makes me appreciate my body, my health, my family and the present moment...which I know can all change in one instance, or with one unfortunate diagnosis. I have worked hard to balance my work life and not internalize all of the tragedy and loss that does exist in this world. You learn quickly that concepts like "guarantees," and "fairness" should never be coupled with expectation in this life. 

The most gratifying moments that I have in my work are getting glimpses into the love that exists between people. I get to witness people share their feelings with their loved ones about how wonderful their lives have been, how they wished they could do it all over again, how important family has been. It is a constant reminder to me that, truly, in the end, our relationships are the only things that matter. And for those who don't have the good fortune of being surrounded by loving family and friends, that is where I feel I get to step in and be the loving kindness that person deserves in their final time on Earth. I get to do that.

When I look back on my experiences, there are names and faces that are imprinted in my mind and on my heart. There are individuals whose stories will never be written about in the news, whose struggles may only be known to a few, and whose journeys will always be shared by me. So, in this post, I hope to convey how thankful I am to know all the beautiful souls I have met and for those who give me purpose through my work with them. 

Diana

When I look at the above picture, I am reminded of how awesome life can be at times. There was a whole history of friendship leading up to this "pinch-me" kind-of-day. This was taken on Valentine's Day 2011, on the streets of Paris, France. Maybe my imagination is limited because I just couldn't believe I was there, with some of the people I care most about in the world. Lucky, blessed, grateful...all of the above.

I am thankful that I have had Diana as a faithful friend since the ninth grade. We were inseparable through high school and ventured off to UT together and I cant imagine what growing up would have been like without a friend like her.

Like many of the people I find myself writing about, the word "generosity" comes to mind when I think about Diana. She is one of the most generous and giving people that I know. She is a giving friend, and also such a support to her family members. Everyone can rely on Diana. She steps up to the plate time and time again.

There isn't enough space and time for me to say really how grateful I am that Diana and I have been best friends through the years. There are ample letters, emails, inside jokes and shenanigans to support the fact that we have been through a lot together and we have had such a blast of it!  Since I have known Diana, I have never had any doubt that she would be a successful person since she is so smart and driven. I am grateful that she has been able to do well in her career, but also that she found a wonderful man who is deserving of being with someone as great as she is. They have a really cool life traveling all around the world and have been able to experience so many fascinating sites. I love when kind, generous, people find happiness and love.  Now, if only they would come back to the US, I would be ever so much more grateful.

Sarah

Sarah is my little sister. She was born when I was just about to turn 8, so there is a bit of an age difference. Even though we fought a lot as children, I always tried to look out for her and wanted the best for her (actually, the same still applies). There were some rough phases. I will never forget her referring to the day I went off to college as "the best day of her life." I hope that is not still true.

But anyway, Sarah is now 22 years old and an emerging professional. She is also studying in the field of social work, and I think that it will suit her personality because she has a strong sense of justice and big heart. She is also one awesome Aunt to Ruby.

Sarah was there waiting in the hospital when Ruby was being delivered and was so excited to meet and hold that little bundle of joy. I thought about how sad it would have been if I didn't have any siblings to share that experience with. Ever since day 1, Sarah has been a huge help to me, even though she was in school and living almost an hour away. I am really thankful that Ruby has such a special Aunt who will spoil her and delight in her successes and growth. Sarah is also really good at a lot of things, especially photography. We are so lucky that she has made Ruby one of her special subjects! There is no way I would have been able to afford professional photography sessions to document her early life, but Sarah has helped capture some of her moments in ways that I will cherish forever.

Besides being creative, smart and generous, Sarah can be pretty funny. I think we have a shared sense of humor, probably one that many sisters have that is unique to them. I am thankful that I have a sister to laugh with, joke with, commiserate with, and spend holidays with. When she was born I was disappointed that it would take so long before she would be able to talk, and interact with me. It felt like it would never happen. But, somehow it did! Grateful for having a little sister I can now call a friend.

Cindi & Matt

Last night we had dinner with our friends, Cindi and Matt, who now live in California. I first met Cindi though Diana, and then when they moved back to Austin for Matt to attend grad school, Nick and I became good friends with them. It was really fun to have a couple that we both enjoyed and got along with really well. So of course we were really sad when they moved to California for Matt's job last summer.

During their time in Austin we had lots of fun enjoying the Austin scene and eating out a lot! We also went to Mardi Gras in New Orleans with them in 2012, which was so much fun. When I think about these two, I am always reminded of their generosity. These are the type of friends who you can count on for anything, and who are always willing to lend a hand.

Last August when I was very pregnant, I opened my email and was surprised to find a gift certificate for a prenatal massage from Cindi and Matt. I was touched by the generosity and thought. What a kind gesture! See, they do things like that.

I am grateful for them because good friends are hard to find, especially as we get older. These two are special people and they helped make the last couple years in Austin really enjoyable. I know that we will remain friends for a while and hopefully be able to return the kindness that they have bestowed upon us.

Nick

Today is a special day in  my life...July 26. Six years ago today, I met the man that I would marry. Nick and I met at a little dive bar in East Austin in 2007. It was a Thursday night and we would have our first date the following night at Fado, an Irish Pub. After that we were pretty much inseparable. It was an exciting time in life, and a period of time I remember with fondness.

What I love about life is unexpected gifts of joy! Meeting Nick was that for me. He had a zest for life, excitement for travel and was really happy to share these things with me. Our lives have changed so much since 2007, and I am just so grateful that we have been able to experience so many things together and explore the world together.

I am grateful that Nick has been such a great planner and enjoys traveling. He has made some cool things happen for me, that I otherwise would not have done. I still pinch myself when I think that I was in Paris, and on Valentine's Day! What fun we have had together!

Now that we have a daughter, I have a whole new appreciation for Nick. I knew that he would be an excellent father, but he has really embraced his role and is active in our daughter's life in ways that I would guess a lot of men may not be. He loves being with Ruby, loves organizing her clothes and picking out matching outfits for her, he is on top of all her nutritional needs and you cant let him go to Babies 'R Us alone because he tends to go a little overboard. He loves all aspects of caring for her and I couldn't ask for a more involved and loving co-parent! I will never forget the look in his eyes when gazing at her in the hospital after she was born. You could tell that his new mission in life was to make her life the best it could be.

I am grateful that we found each other this day six years ago and am I extra-thankful that he said "yes" when I asked him out. I believe in fate and so I guess that there really wasn't any other way. Every day I am thankful that I have Nick in my life and for all that he is to Ruby and me.

Dad

When I was little, I was definitely a "Daddy's Girl." We did a lot together. On his day off, my dad would pick me up and we would go look at plant nurseries and eat at Luby's. I loved eating at Luby's and picking out a cup of cubed Jell-O and an Andes Mint at the check-out. In high school and when I was out of college, we would usually go to Tom Thumb together and I always enjoyed that. I could get whatever I wanted when I was with my Dad. I think that is why I always enjoy grocery shopping even today.

I am grateful for my Dad for many reasons, but one of the things I am most thankful for is how he always made me feel loved and worthy. Now that I am older, I can see the impact that both of my parents had on who I am today and how I exist in the world. I think that the way he loved me and treated me will help me raise my daughter in a similar way. He was never quick to anger, and rarely lost his temper with me. The loving kindness that he always showed me is something that you don't just witness, you feel.

My Dad is the guy I would have hand-picked if I had the opportunity to pick out a father for myself. I could not have asked for someone more loving, patient, and kind. I don't know how I got so lucky, but I did. I am also grateful that he and Ruby will get to spend time together and hope my Dad gets to teach her all the things she needs to know about plants and sport and other grand-fatherly things.

Mom

Last May when I was pregnant with Ruby, I remember Mother's Day Sunday.  I sat in the car before my yoga class reading letters to the editor that people had written about their moms. I was in tears. They were all so touching. This year, I decided I should write my own and submit it to The Dallas Morning News. I was surprised when it was actually published. It pretty much sums up a lot of reasons why I am grateful for my mom. And I will copy it here.

Basically my mom is one of the best. We are a lot alike. She taught me Scrabble at a young age, and I think she would proud that I can even beat her some these days (Well, maybe not. She is very competitive when it comes to Scrabble). My mom is someone who takes pleasure in the simple things life has to offer and I think that she has taught her children to do the same. I am grateful for that because I think that is why I think I lead a pretty happy life. My mom is easy to be with. A lot of people have Mother-issues, but i can't say that I do. I owe almost everything that I am to her and am grateful for the love and the letting-go that she has given me. Loving is easy, the letting go...not so much.

Home > Letters to the Editor

I got my strength from my mother

By Letters to the Editor
letters@dallasnews.com
2:18 pm on May 11, 2013 | Permalink

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This is my first Mother’s Day as a mom. Now that I have a child, I see my own mother with new eyes and a bottomless depth of gratitude.

As my own journey into motherhood begins, the values she exemplified to me as a child teach me lessons in this current season of life.

When my maternity leave ended and I struggled with returning to my job as a social worker, I thought of my mother.

Through her love of teaching, she showed me the importance of doing work that touches people and has meaning.

When feeling overwhelmed in the mornings, I think of my mother, who taught me the value of punctuality by having her children on time for school, and by never being late for work a day in her life.

During the sleepless nights when fatigue sets in and I don’t know how I will function, I think of my mother.

She and I made it through these same nights together, decades ago. Her patience and calm are now mine as I rock my baby to sleep.

Not a day goes by that I don’t think, “Mom, I don’t know how you did it, but thank you.”

Carly Bassett, Austin, @carly819